Not Perfect, But All Right

30 Oct

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2014 has not been kind.

On a cold, snowy day in January, when my husband was in Tokyo, my 10 year old son received a lifelong sentence. It began with a sick visit to the pediatrician followed by another sick visit to a gastroenterologist. As I sat across from this woman, who I disliked as soon as she entered the room, I could not imagine that my son’s world was going to permanently change. After a brief examination and a denial of all symptoms from which she was sure he was suffering, she stoically pronounced “he has Crohn’s,” which only made me hate her more than I already did. She prescribed antibiotics and advised that he would need to be examined under general anesthesia.

That night, my son slept in my bed. I spent most of the night feeling his forehead, making sure he was still asleep, plotting the death of that emotionless doctor. By the time it was morning,  we were on our way to the emergency room. A morphine drip was administered and my son finally relaxed.

An MRI revealed that my son had an abscess which required draining. He remained on the morphine as well as IV antibiotics and by the time the surgery was performed, the abscess was already gone. We were there for several days, during which time every physician assured me that they did not think my son had Crohn’s. I assured myself of this as well, right up until the time we were leaving when the discharging doctor looked over his forms and said “I don’t see what else it could be aside from Crohn’s.” And just like that, the rug on which I was solidly standing, was pulled out from under me. Again.

A few weeks later a blood test revealed no inflammation. That horrible doctor was wrong. I knew it. A week after that my son started to complain of stomach pain. A week after that, a stool sample was three times the normal level and I had to offer some begrudging respect to this woman who so casually spoke the words that would change my son’s life. By April, a colonoscopy/endoscopy confirmed that she was, in fact, right. She was always right. My son had Crohn’s Disease and the tiny thread attached to my heart that came loose in January, started to fully unravel.

I did not want an education about fancy medication, about the physiology of the colon, about colostomies, about therapies offering ways my child can “live with Crohn’s.” I wanted him to be the person I thought he was, physically, on the morning of that snowy day in January. I wanted to circle the equator over and over like Superman until I reversed time enough to unearth Lois Lane from her car and free my son from a diagnosis I did not want attached to him. I wanted to find a new doctor, one that was a human being, one that would not tell me, when I asked if my child would be ok, that she “can’t predict the future.” I wanted someone to hold my hand and my heart.

I know that there are worse things in life than Crohn’s Disease and that my son will be all right. But we mothers don’t want our children to be just “all right.” We want them to be perfect. Being a parent is so hard. From skinned knees to bruised egos to diseases about which we want to know nothing. I would love it if I could just kiss this terrible boo boo or apply ice to it, or simply make a wish and watch it fade away until there is nothing left but the perfect body into which he was born. He’s learning too much too soon and I hate it. He has a sophisticated medical vocabulary, refers to his pills as “my meds” and is overly concerned about his height and weight. On the other hand, right before a second operation, he gamely dressed up in his gown, sterile shower cap, and held up a book, pretending to be the Statue of Liberty.

So maybe he’s doing all right already. And maybe 2014 has been kinder than I thought.

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287 Responses to “Not Perfect, But All Right”

  1. eliseelholm November 3, 2014 at 8:50 am #

    I wish you and your son all the best. I was diagnosed at the age of 18. I remember my dad was devastated and I was just glad I didn’t have cancer. Attitude means something, and your son seems to have a good one. Keep it up!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 3, 2014 at 4:43 pm #

      Thank you so much, Elise! I hope you are well.

  2. Melanie Notkin November 5, 2014 at 10:53 pm #

    Beautiful essay, Lisa. I’m so sorry he’s dealing with this – and that you and Jeff and the boys are too. xo

    • Lisa Goodwin November 6, 2014 at 1:46 am #

      Thank you so much, Melanie! Hope all is well with you. xo

  3. Liz Evans November 6, 2014 at 7:40 pm #

    Beautifully written Lisa, I’m so sorry he has to deal with Crohn’s, but it sounds like he’s already doing a fabulous job with your help. I had many of the same feelings when my son was finally diagnosed with PDD-NOS (on the Autism spectrum). I spent years going from one doctor to another, one teacher to another, and most everyone had a different idea of what was going on. It’s so hard to get confirmation that your child will be affected by something for the rest of his life that you can do very little about. Thinking of you all.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 6, 2014 at 10:37 pm #

      Thank you so much, Liz! I’m sorry you too have your own ordeal! Your boy is so gorgeous and you are a wonderful mom from what I can tell. A lifelong diagnosis is just so sadly permanent and unimaginable. Helplessness is equally saddening. I wish you and your beautiful son the best always! xo

  4. mansouraaaa November 17, 2014 at 9:16 pm #

    good

  5. J November 17, 2014 at 10:02 pm #

    People with beautiful spirits are perfect…and judging by these photos of your son…He indeed has that spirit. 🙂 All the best to you both…

    • Lisa Goodwin November 17, 2014 at 10:57 pm #

      Hi J,
      Thank you so much for this comment! I love it! And you are right, he so does.

  6. Stuart M. Perkins November 17, 2014 at 10:24 pm #

    Beautiful post.

  7. Marie November 17, 2014 at 10:28 pm #

    Looking to your photo, I see an individual with a great sense of humor that hints at intelligence and resilience; traits that are far more valuable and infinitely more interesting than perfect. Best of luck and congratulations on being Freshly Pressed.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 17, 2014 at 10:56 pm #

      Marie

      Thank you so very much for your beautiful and wise words! You are so right! I appreciate your feedback.

  8. segmation November 17, 2014 at 10:52 pm #

    Hi Lisa, It sounds to me your son is lucky to have you in his corner to help him with his disease. It is nice you are sharing your experience with us on this blog. I don’t know if you are aware but Mike McCready who is the Rocker McCready, the lead guitarist for Pearl Jam, considers himself a lucky man, despite having Crohn’s disease. In 2007, he told BigButtRadio.com that he is blessed to make a living doing what he truly loves. Here is a quote from McCready, “I went public with my condition to show people that despite the disease, you can still have a life and career,” he said in a statement. This to me is another encouraging statement regarding Crohn’s! Best to you and your son.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 17, 2014 at 10:55 pm #

      Thank you so much for your comment. I did not know about Mike McCready and this is all kind of new to us. It is so important, however, not to mention inspiring, to see people living their life and living it well! Thank you so much for pointing this information out to me and for your kind words. They are both truly appreciated.

  9. K'lee L. November 17, 2014 at 11:03 pm #

    The story of your son’s health challenge and your love for him took my mind back to a book I’d read and still have on my bookshelf called, ‘Patient Heal Thyself’ by Jordan S. Rubin N.M.D., PH.D.. I apologize if someone’s already mentioned it or if you’ve already read it. If you haven’t read it, might I suggest it?
    My prayers to both you and your extraordinarily courageous son.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 17, 2014 at 11:22 pm #

      Thank you, K’Lee. I have not yet heard about that book but I will definitely check it out. I’m so grateful for your advice and thoughtfulness!

      • K'lee L. November 18, 2014 at 1:50 am #

        You’re very welcomed, Lisa. I hope the book can be of some help.

        K’lee

  10. ZoryPR November 17, 2014 at 11:06 pm #

    May God bless you and your son. I see a beautiful human being in your photo. Great job mommy… I wish all the best.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 17, 2014 at 11:21 pm #

      Thank you so much, Zory! I appreciate your prayers and kindness. He is a great kid!

  11. Simplexvita November 17, 2014 at 11:48 pm #

    Crohn’s is awful, it’s difficult to get a handle on sometimes. I’m not even close to a doctor but food allergies can make Crohn’s worse-I know from experience. I wish your son all the best that life has to offer.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 2:01 am #

      Thank you so much! I really appreciate that.

  12. Darell Grant November 18, 2014 at 1:02 am #

    Totally following your blog. I’m amazed and inspired! Thanks, and never stop blogging!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 2:02 am #

      Wow, Darell! Thank you so much! I’m truly flattered.

      • Darell Grant November 18, 2014 at 2:04 am #

        No problem! I look forward to reading more. Ttyl!

  13. Darell Grant November 18, 2014 at 1:03 am #

    Best of luck to your ADORABLE son! He’ll be fine cause I have a feeling that you’ll NEVER stop loving em!

  14. Marissa November 18, 2014 at 1:43 am #

    So beautiful

  15. Holly November 18, 2014 at 2:10 am #

    Good luck to you! It’s always hard to find out that your once healthy child is suddenly not. When my 2-week-old baby had to have surgery, it was scary, but he’s now a healthy seven-year-old. Persevere!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 2:31 am #

      So glad your son is doing well, Holly! Thank you for your post!

  16. jupiterbeings November 18, 2014 at 2:35 am #

    Hoping he rides the storm.
    http://www.alternet.org/drugs/8-miraculous-medical-marijuana-survival-stories

  17. SuperMom November 18, 2014 at 2:49 am #

    Great post. My daughter has recently been dignosed with Celiacs by biopsy. She also has been tested as having the Chrones gene (homozygeous – which means she has a double dose.). Odds of developing the disease is about 80% by the time she reaches 30. Of course they say “don’t worry”. But how can you not.

    I wish you and your son the best.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 3:17 am #

      I totally get it! In fact, this son of mine has a twin brother with Celiac. He’s doing great. Best of luck, SuperMom!

  18. Max November 18, 2014 at 2:53 am #

    All the best! Your essay made me feel of my younger brother who had Crohn’s when he was merely a teen. He is a alright now.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 3:17 am #

      Thank you, Max. It makes me feel so great to stories like those of your brother!

  19. Robin Dawn Hudechek November 18, 2014 at 2:53 am #

    Thank you for sharing this beautiful post. Your son sounds like a bright and courageous young man, and you are a wonderful mother! I am sure with his many natural gifts, and your love and encouragement, he will have a very bright future!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 3:18 am #

      Thank you so much, Robin! I’m truly touched!

  20. misternorman November 18, 2014 at 2:59 am #

    Melanie, lay your hands on that boys head and tell that disease to leave his body in Jesus name. When you’re done that will be the end of that disease. I don’t care his long it has lingered. All I care about is that your sob can be permanently healed of it. Stay blessed.

  21. Sulfen November 18, 2014 at 3:02 am #

    I was diagnosed for heart failure around that same time. My parents were devastated at first. What really helped me was that they acted strong in front of me, as did I in front of them. Stay strong even if just in front of your son.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 3:19 am #

      Great advice. Thank you so much. I hope you are doing well!

      • Sulfen November 18, 2014 at 3:27 am #

        I am feeling like new with my new heart. There really is light at the end of a heavy battle.

    • amoafowaa November 21, 2014 at 5:54 pm #

      Hope u’re good now.

  22. ajs78 November 18, 2014 at 4:00 am #

    Mother’s pride, he will be fine

  23. hilthethrill November 18, 2014 at 4:12 am #

    I was diagnosed with hashimotos disease this year and it feels like when Lucy moves Charlie browns football, doesn’t it? Highly irritating.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 4:34 am #

      That is the perfect analogy! I hope you are doing well.

  24. simplyadarksoul November 18, 2014 at 4:20 am #

    God bless your family, this was beautiful.

  25. gballabh November 18, 2014 at 4:45 am #

    I was deeply touched by the honest recording of mothers feelings confronted with modern sterile medical system which least said is de humanized. Earlier a physician was trained in bed side manners and practicing an art and science of which he /she and all other physicians know very little as rightly enshrined in the biblical saying “Physician Heal Thyself “they should practice loving kindness .Sickness and well being are in Gods hands and
    physician should be Gods” emissary. govindballabh

  26. bestdigitalbooks November 18, 2014 at 5:05 am #

    beautiful writing, may God give you strength.

  27. rubiescorner November 18, 2014 at 5:56 am #

    You sound as brave as your son. I wish you the best.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 11:37 am #

      Oh my! That is quite a compliment. Thank you so very much.

  28. lordebayism November 18, 2014 at 6:43 am #

    All izz well.

  29. lbeth1950 November 18, 2014 at 7:52 am #

    Wonderful story. Learning your child is ill is so hard. I’ve been there. The best to both of you.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 11:38 am #

      Thank you so much. It is; it’s the worst. I hope all is well with you and your family too.

      • lbeth1950 November 20, 2014 at 8:30 am #

        Thanks. We are on the “roller coaster”

  30. alfadzriq November 18, 2014 at 8:09 am #

    All the best to you. Be strong!

  31. followechoes November 18, 2014 at 9:48 am #

    When you do get a good Doctor its makes life that bit easier. When you get one’s that you don’t get a great feeling about it makes the ordeal more horrific. I have met some that I felt like punching (haven’t yet) wishing you all the best. Fingers crossed for a better 2015.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 11:40 am #

      Thank you so much! We have a wonderful doctor, obtained the minute I received my son’s diagnosis from the other doctor. It makes the whole experience that much more tolerable. Wishing you all the best as well.

  32. averyarts November 18, 2014 at 10:39 am #

    I was drawn to this blog by the spirited ‘Attitude’ pictures of your son. I’m glad I read on, i thought your blog was really well written. I have had loads of health issues through my time and can totally relate to your ‘deep seated’ feelings about the consultant!
    Try to take care of yourself too, as sometimes i am not sure who is suffering the most when we see our loved ones ‘going through it’!
    Best wishes all round!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 11:41 am #

      Thank you and I agree! It’s harder to watch it for me than it is to live it for him. All the best to you as well.

  33. Angie K November 18, 2014 at 10:41 am #

    I am sorry that all this is happening to your son. He seems like a great boy and is holding it well. Be strong for him, which I know is very difficult. I am a mum of two myself and just pray they will always be healthy. It must have taken lots of courage for you to post this. My best wishes to him. Xxx

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 11:41 am #

      Thank you so much, Angie!

      • Angie K November 18, 2014 at 12:05 pm #

        You are welcome, all the best. I may as well follow your blog now, best wishes from the UK, and feel free to stop by and maybe follow back (if you have time for all this, of course)..

  34. tanyakochar November 18, 2014 at 11:51 am #

    I’m sorry to hear about your son, but seeing his positive attitude, I’m sure he’ll be able to fight this, and lead a happy, normal life with you. Just keep that hope alive always, heartiest prayers and wishes for you all. You’re one really strong woman 🙂

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 12:15 pm #

      Thank you so much! I am touched by your words.

  35. lunamoth November 18, 2014 at 12:02 pm #

    He looks like a strong little guy.. Sending positive energy for better times ahead!

  36. Arsha bee November 18, 2014 at 12:04 pm #

    there is always a rainbow on the other side of the storm……

  37. pilotsofimpossible November 18, 2014 at 12:08 pm #

    The best good vibes 🙏

  38. ardensta November 18, 2014 at 12:44 pm #

    Wow

  39. Lady_K November 18, 2014 at 12:47 pm #

    I was diagnosed with it in 2001, but in 2010…another doctor said I had ulcerative colitis. I understand it as an adult, but I can only imagine what it must be like as a child…let alone the parent of the child that has it. There are ways to live with it (eating habits, finding what triggers it most…like red sauce, nuts, etc.). I am thankful for being considered a “mild case” (although some days it doesn’t feel like it). I wish you the best of luck for you and your son…

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 12:48 pm #

      Thank you so much for your words! They make me feel so much better for me and for my son. You cannot buy optimism. Thank you!

      I hope you are well!

      • Lady_K November 18, 2014 at 1:00 pm #

        You’re welcome! the first couple months I wasn’t optimistic about it at all, but once you learn more about it, what can trigger what I like to call “an episode”, and ways to work around it, things can get a bit easier. At first, it can kind of suck that you have to pay more attention on what you consume and how much you consume…but all in all, it’s worth it. Whatever knowledge you absorb about “Crohnes”, help him to understand it as well so it’s less scary to him. Good luck

  40. locain November 18, 2014 at 1:05 pm #

    Reblogged this on Loca.In.

  41. messyeffe November 18, 2014 at 1:22 pm #

    That was inspiring, thank you for sharing your experience with us. I’m sure that your kindness will be repaid one day!

    http://obsessedorhotmess.wordpress.com

  42. conversationeducation November 18, 2014 at 1:31 pm #

    A diagnosis is brutal when it comes to your child no matter what it is. My daughter was diagnosed with Leukemia at 3 years old and relapsed when she was 8. She is now 21! Wishing you all the very best. I have written a little bit about this here..http://conversationeducation.com/2014/04/26/mother-and-daughter-and-leukemia-writing-heals/

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 4:00 pm #

      I am so sorry to hear about your daughter and so relieved and inspired to know that she is another incredible tale of survival! I will definitely check out your piece. Thank you so much for the comment!

  43. ywwp November 18, 2014 at 1:41 pm #

    My best wishes – regards http://YourWellWisherProgram.wordpress.com

  44. maonela November 18, 2014 at 1:56 pm #

    Reblogged this on maonela01's Blog.

  45. dafanugraha November 18, 2014 at 1:57 pm #

    Reblogged this on dafanugraha's Blog.

  46. darby28 November 18, 2014 at 2:02 pm #

    Hi im new to bloging n i saw ur post it was very touching. I will pray for yall. Im tryin to get my post on here but not seeming to be able to find it. I know your probably busy but if u could me thatll be grest. Ty

  47. kaymerchant November 18, 2014 at 2:15 pm #

    Very beautifully written. I admire your strength through such a hard situation. I wish you and your family the very best of luck.

  48. Angeline Vidhula Jeyachandra-Shanthi November 18, 2014 at 2:38 pm #

    You have a beautiful son, and you’re an amazing mother – from the words I see written here. In total, you’re surely, surely perfect 🙂 I maybe much younger and inexperienced while saying this, but, after all, being perfect is about the mind than our body itself ain’t it 🙂 Good luck to you and your family.

  49. primaverainspiaggia November 18, 2014 at 3:15 pm #

    Holaa

  50. 4jeaedr November 18, 2014 at 3:18 pm #

    Indeed, God is good! 😀

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 4:03 pm #

      Thank you

      • 4jeaedr November 18, 2014 at 4:25 pm #

        welcome. How i wish you’d follow me back. I am new to this stuff. 😀

  51. dkstevens327 November 18, 2014 at 3:25 pm #

    Reblogged this on dkstevens327.

  52. dkstevens327 November 18, 2014 at 3:25 pm #

    Reblogged this on dkstevens327.

  53. The Accidentally Running Mom November 18, 2014 at 3:32 pm #

    Good Luck to both you and your little man on his journey. Great Post.

  54. halleheather November 18, 2014 at 3:44 pm #

    As hard and challenging as this experience is, stay strong! The times where things go wrong and life is chaotic that shape us the most. Your soon is a fighter! This story is compelling and can be used to inspire many! Thanks for sharing and keep writing!

    https://halleheather.wordpress.com

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 4:05 pm #

      Thank you so much! I really appreciate that! We are now channeling our energy into a big fundraiser for this cause next weekend so, in sum, we’re making some lemonade.

  55. ilhamsalembou1 November 18, 2014 at 4:11 pm #

    c’est vrai nous ne sommes pas parfaits mais nous sommes honnêtes

  56. David Atilola November 18, 2014 at 4:13 pm #

    Awesome!

  57. Syeda Roshaan Fakhar November 18, 2014 at 4:23 pm #

    Sad to hear about your son having Crohn’s but more than happy to know that he’s a fighter. Stay strong. Prayers are with your family! 🙂

  58. anasrafiq92 November 18, 2014 at 6:43 pm #

    Ma’m i want to ask that how ur son feels ? Does hi keep his feeling untold or express it bcz if he dont u must make him speek try to make him laugh bcz some time we think that we can not bear it any more but as a muslim i blieve whatever we face God give us power to face it also…btw lot of prayers for him he is a superman and someday will give u a world tour on his back 🙂

  59. The Person Next to You November 18, 2014 at 7:09 pm #

    As another family dealing with multiple chronic illnesses, I feel for you. It is not easy, and coming to terms with things is a very long and personal journey. Thank you for sharing!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 8:23 pm #

      Thank you so much. I hope your family is well!

  60. Meaningless November 18, 2014 at 7:54 pm #

    Reblogged this on MeaningfulMeanings and commented:
    Nice Read…

  61. mstioko November 18, 2014 at 10:06 pm #

    Beautiful!!!

  62. Silicon Valley Mom of 3 November 18, 2014 at 10:11 pm #

    Being a parent is so hard- you are right! I wish you and your son all the best! I am a mom of 3 too and have my own challenges.

  63. Enviroart November 18, 2014 at 10:25 pm #

    Very well written Lisa. If it’s any consolation, I know 2 striving happy and healthy people with it. Good luck to you and your son

    • Lisa Goodwin November 18, 2014 at 10:45 pm #

      Thank you so much! Yes, that is consolation indeed!

  64. Adam November 19, 2014 at 1:27 am #

    I’ve been through similar situations as a kid. As long as he knows you love him in whatever condition he may be, then that is enough.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 1:55 am #

      Thank you so much, Adam! That is beautiful advice! Hope you are well.

  65. claudiaschwartz2014 November 19, 2014 at 2:20 am #

    Best of luck to your son and you 🙂 . Things will always turn out for the best.

  66. rachnachattoraj November 19, 2014 at 3:59 am #

    Being a parent myself, I understand what you must have been going through. May God give you courage and my wishes for your son.

  67. creativeshite November 19, 2014 at 6:21 am #

    Good Luck 🙂

  68. Jennifer November 19, 2014 at 7:26 am #

    So many friends are struggling with sick little ones right now. We all want perfect children, but that isn’t reality. Reality sometimes sucks. There are worse things, but this isn’t fun or easy. It will change his life. Good news, he will adapt and his new normal will be normal soon enough. Best wishes for the good doctors to also be kind people. Makes a huge difference.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 2:30 pm #

      Thank you, Jennifer. I know this all too well, sadly. And you are right.

  69. foodallyoucan November 19, 2014 at 9:32 am #

    Not perfect but all right. You got it on the nail! Living with a sickness that is not fatal but equally just as horrifying. You are doing a terrific job as a parent!
    Us, we are living with the fact that our teener son has asthma, with occasional attacks that can lead to hospitalization.
    But he has asthma beaten to bits somehow, even though it is still there. He is a champion varsity swimmer and a medical student. He is very proficient in guitar instruments (bass, acoustic, electric, ukulele) and has varied hobbies and interests.
    God Bless you and your kid!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 2:31 pm #

      Thank you so much! I’m so happy to hear your son is thriving. All the best to you!

  70. Edges Concepts November 19, 2014 at 9:35 am #

    Reblogged this on 14Edges' Blog.

  71. m2tsaysdenim November 19, 2014 at 10:21 am #

    Reblogged this on memetsaysdenim.

  72. springriver November 19, 2014 at 10:31 am #

    Great writer. I will following your blog to read you continue artile.

  73. jeremiahshiaka November 19, 2014 at 11:07 am #

    Reblogged this on DJ J.BOY ENTERTAINMENT.

  74. roweeee November 19, 2014 at 11:16 am #

    Hi Lisa.
    We are strangers yet I wish I could give you a hug. I have a severe auto-immune disease where my muscles attack themselves resulting in muscle weakness. It also attacks my lungs and skin. I have joined the muscular dystrophy association where I have not only not got to know families going through so much but also young people who have overcome so much yet do the seemingly impossible. My friend’s daughter has Crohns and as you know, it is not easy. Thinking of you.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 2:31 pm #

      Thank you so much! I’ll consider this that much needed hug. All the best to you.

      • roweeee November 21, 2014 at 10:58 am #

        You’re welcome and thank you for your best wishes. Every bit helps!

  75. dimas76424 November 19, 2014 at 4:20 pm #

    Tak perlu sempurna untuk menjadi yang terbaik 🙂

  76. askaskaskaskask123 November 19, 2014 at 4:37 pm #

    hello my name is camila

  77. itsmayurremember November 19, 2014 at 5:10 pm #

    Hopefully all will turn out alright. Trust your sun, he has the strength to pullout through this, just he needs your support. Maybe you being all worried up and fretting will make it worse. But i am not a parent, only a kid who saw both of his parents go through surgery before i was 20. So maybe my advice won’t be of much use
    Once again best wishes

  78. inconsistent pseudonym November 19, 2014 at 5:51 pm #

    This is inspirational and beautiful. Best wishes to you both.

  79. amommasview November 19, 2014 at 6:53 pm #

    I wish you both all the best!

  80. mustaphabarki2014 November 19, 2014 at 7:44 pm #

    Reblogged this on Engineer Marine Skipper.

  81. mustaphabarki2014 November 19, 2014 at 7:44 pm #

    Reblogged this on Ninja Networking Engineering by Barki Mustapha .

  82. awax1217 November 19, 2014 at 9:53 pm #

    Twelve years ago my grandson was diagnosed with brain cancer. He was two. He had six chemos and stem cell work. He survived. Every once in a while the miracle happens. I wish you have the same luck.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 10:25 pm #

      Thank you so much. What a story! I am so glad to hear your grandson survived that ordeal. Lots of luck to you and your family.

  83. Rina Macasaet November 19, 2014 at 10:40 pm #

    I can relate to your story. My niece who lives in NY was exhibiting the same symptoms as Crohn’s… Living in the opposite side of the world, my sister and I were back and forth in conversation lending support to one another, hoping against all odds that it wasn’t anything serious. My poor niece thought she was near death, vomiting endlessly. Waiting for her turn to see the doctor was just as grueling as the pain she was enduring.

    But you remind me of my sister- a super mom! And your son reminds me of my niece – super Angels!

    Everything will be alright 🙂

    • Lisa Goodwin November 19, 2014 at 10:44 pm #

      Thank you so much, Rina! I am so glad to hear your niece is doing well. Thank you for your encouragement and optimism!

  84. aliseandbetty November 19, 2014 at 10:49 pm #

    I love the picture its so cute

  85. aliseandbetty November 19, 2014 at 11:00 pm #

    Reblogged this on thekidagent and commented:
    Here is a kid in a tough situation but he’s still making the best of it.

  86. Veena November 20, 2014 at 2:58 am #

    That is one brave boy 🙂 Godbless!

  87. oneintercessor November 20, 2014 at 4:35 am #

    Such a hard disease and so varied with treatments. I hope you find what works best for your son and that his times of difficulty are few and far between. In case it is helpful at some point and you haven’t heard of it yet, my good friend’s son was helped with Entyvio. It’s a newer drug that blocks while blood cells from going to the gut only rather than the whole body. God bless your family.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 20, 2014 at 11:58 am #

      Thank you so much. I really appreciate the info and the sentiment.

  88. makkaayyllaa November 20, 2014 at 5:00 am #

    Reblogged this on makkaayyllaa.

  89. LivenLove November 20, 2014 at 6:38 am #

    Wow! Sorry. I can only imagine what a parent will go through when a child is sick. His test will become a testimony and I pray your son will get healed in Jesus name! Wishing you all the best.

  90. hardworkingirls November 20, 2014 at 8:11 am #

    Oh nice! Visit our blog pls
    Kisses from Spain (:

  91. natry18 November 20, 2014 at 8:25 am #

    I am so sorry to hear this. While I was reading I felt your words and I saw myself right in that chair when my little sister was diagnosed with diabetes. It just came in like a slap in the face, no one in my family was diabetic and the only thing I knew about diabetes was it was the “you-can’t-eat-sugar” disease.

    I refused at first to learn about insulin shots and how to manage a six year old child with such a condition. You see, my sis is like my daughter, we are 11 years apart and I have always been overprotective with her. I understand when you say “you don’t want them just to be ok, you want them to be perfect”. She is 16 now and has grown into a beautiful young lady, it’s been hard but she is doing ok.

    Your son is a beautiful little boy and no matter what condition or disease he may suffer he is still perfect. Seems you are doing a great job.

    Beautiful written, dear.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 20, 2014 at 12:00 pm #

      Thank you so much! I’m so glad to hear your sister is doing well and I wish you and her continued good health and all the best life has to offer. xx

  92. kalmering November 20, 2014 at 11:18 am #

    What a great piece. I just saw the title and the picture and was drawn towards it and reading it you seem like an amazing mother! Best of luck.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 20, 2014 at 12:00 pm #

      Aw, thank you so very much! That’s beautiful!

  93. bwcarey November 20, 2014 at 1:31 pm #

    Being a parent isn’t easy, but your son’s condition is a challenge he’s adapting to, just treat him normal is the best thing, to make the point, these type of diseases are on the up, as are asthma, blindness etc, it must be down to chemical use, perhaps organic food will help,

  94. manja111 November 20, 2014 at 3:41 pm #

    Interesting. Hey would you like to check out my blog? I’ll be very happy about it. This is awesome and very usefull. And why do you don’t check my blog out?
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  95. Craig Canapari MD November 20, 2014 at 10:12 pm #

    Thanks for sharing your story. As a pediatrician and a dad I really value the insight you have provided here.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 20, 2014 at 10:57 pm #

      Thank you so much! I am so glad you feel that way.

  96. youareawallflower November 20, 2014 at 10:59 pm #

    i recognized myself in so much i just read. my best friend got diagnosed with a rare form of bone marrow cancer when she was 14. I’ll never forgive the doctors that treated her. after what was supposed to be an easy surgery she woke up paralyzed from the chest down. The doctor had been careless and damaged a nerve. 2 years later just after being cleared cancer free. she got a blood cloth in her leg that traveled to her brain and she didn’t make it. that was 4 years ago and i think about her everyday.

    So you go girl ! Don’t take no sh*t, you seem like a great mom. Best of luck to you and your family

    • Lisa Goodwin November 20, 2014 at 11:22 pm #

      Thank you so much! I am so sorry to hear about your friend. What a tragedy. But don’t worry about me. I don’t take no sh*t! You are right. xx

  97. chordgitarlengkap November 20, 2014 at 11:09 pm #

    Beautiful..

  98. edavis22 November 21, 2014 at 2:50 am #

    Reblogged this on Liberation.

  99. neillumacad November 21, 2014 at 6:04 am #

    Reblogged this on neillumacad.

  100. claireannewood November 21, 2014 at 11:19 am #

    Such a powerfully written blog. You sound like a great mum 🙂 Wishing and praying for you and your son.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 21, 2014 at 1:07 pm #

      Thank you so much, Claire. I appreciate that.

  101. Katherine Shirley November 21, 2014 at 12:55 pm #

    My uncle was diagnosed at the age of 16. He is now in his 60s and still plays tennis and cycles several times a week, eats a fairly normal diet (though he avoids things likely to cause a blockage) and has a lovely home and a family. When he was younger, he used to own and run his own business. My uncle is in no way a tragic character, nor is he to be pitied.

    Diagnosis doesn’t have to be viewed as a life sentence. In many respects, it is the opposite. Now you have an idea of what may have caused the abscess, and what may increase the chance of further digestive problems in future, you can plan, you can lessen the risk to your son so he starts to feel better. You are no longer powerless in the face of something unexplained.

    Life is rarely perfect, but surprises are not always bad news. I wish you both all the best, especially now that you have an idea what you are dealing with.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 21, 2014 at 1:09 pm #

      This made me feel so great. Thank you so much for the GOOD story, which people often neglect to tell. The stories I always hear are about the one person with Crohn’s someone knows and always ends in a colostomy. I don’t know why people do that!

      I am so glad to hear your uncle is doing great. What an inspiration.

      I know my son will be fine as well. I just wish all he was facing was the regular ups and downs of childhood.

      Thank you so much again for the optimism and the wisdom.

      • Katherine Shirley November 21, 2014 at 2:18 pm #

        Just to clarify – my uncle does have a colostomy, but he never let it stop him doing the things he wanted.

  102. priyankarajnath November 21, 2014 at 5:03 pm #

    I hope your son’s and your suffering eases with time. May God bless you!

  103. Human Relationships November 21, 2014 at 5:40 pm #

    Reblogged this on Human Relationships and commented:
    I wish for our kids never get sick! This boy is a survivor, I can see how strong he is, and still find ability to smile!
    Unfortunately, nothing and nobody in this world is perfect, and sometimes God makes us live throughout hard and disappointing moments in life.
    One very important lesson I have learned in life: ” Whatever doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger!”
    Please be strong, positive and thank our creator for having such a wonderful boy, alive and still healthy enough to live a long life!
    Have a great weekend!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 21, 2014 at 6:05 pm #

      Thank you so much! These are great words to live by.

  104. amoafowaa November 21, 2014 at 6:03 pm #

    My prayers to you. I have an autistic three yr old, and I tell you, when doctors told me he needs special school, I broke down. Still dealing with it. Life is not easy caring for a child with special needs. My prayers are with you.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 21, 2014 at 6:06 pm #

      Thank you so much! I hope your son is doing well. xx

      • amoafowaa November 21, 2014 at 6:07 pm #

        Working on it, not perfect, but okay.

  105. Tita November 22, 2014 at 5:02 pm #

    All the best to your son!

  106. Caro November 22, 2014 at 5:19 pm #

    I know that feeling. If you find the superman capes, get two. I’ll fly with you.

  107. brookums71 November 23, 2014 at 1:07 am #

    Lisa, I am a pediatric RN who work on a GI floor for many years. I understand your concerns and anger. It is an awful disease and comes at a crucial time in a teenagers life. Just know, you are not alone.

  108. walkingthroughanimperfectsociety November 23, 2014 at 5:18 am #

    Reblogged this on walkingthroughanimperfectsociety.

  109. veerachavan November 23, 2014 at 7:28 am #

    Not perfect..? Look at The picture, your son looks so confident and full Of life. Every thing will work out. He looks like, and im sure he is a wonderful lad! I hope you two pull through gracefully and strong. Ur essay was beautifully written

    • Lisa Goodwin November 23, 2014 at 5:32 pm #

      Thank you so much! You are right!

      • veerachavan November 23, 2014 at 5:34 pm #

        Hey i just said what i thought 🙂 and i do admire your courage. May god bless u both

  110. tewfree November 23, 2014 at 10:56 am #

    cheers!

  111. fraualles November 23, 2014 at 12:26 pm #

    super

  112. domjones7 November 23, 2014 at 6:56 pm #

    I wish you and your family all the best! Your son looks like a fighter!

  113. excel2007master November 24, 2014 at 2:27 pm #

    Can I make a recommendation? You are your son’s guardian angel and he needs you. However, take your lead from him. As long as he is happy, you can be happy. Let him get dirty. Let him make mistakes. Don’t blame the doctor for her lack of bedside manner. Listen to your son!

  114. frazzled07 November 24, 2014 at 7:21 pm #

    Doctors do seem detatched and nonhuman, but can you imagine how hard their job must be to see so many difficult diagnoses for their patients? It is a job l can most assuredly say l don’t want! I hope you and your son are doing okay. ❤

  115. Senatssekretär FREISTAAT DANZIG November 24, 2014 at 9:43 pm #

    Reblogged this on Aussiedlerbetreuung und Behinderten – Fragen.

  116. sambit444 November 25, 2014 at 10:52 am #

    Reblogged this on worldinyourpocketathome.

  117. Saba Jahangir November 25, 2014 at 1:45 pm #

    Sad but being strong is what you need to do the most..things will go easy and bearable, it will pass eventually. Wish you and your son health and all the good lucks.

  118. pbarron2014 November 25, 2014 at 2:53 pm #

    Reblogged this on Awkwardly Able and commented:
    I imagine this is how my mom felt

  119. kennedymbooks November 25, 2014 at 11:58 pm #

    Reblogged this on kmbooks20 and commented:
    My prayers go out to this amazing boy and Mother!

  120. Robin Venturelli November 26, 2014 at 12:11 am #

    My son was diagnosed with Celiac disease at 15. He’s now 21 and has adjusted, as have my husband and I. It has made him a more compassionate person. Wishing you all the best.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 26, 2014 at 12:42 pm #

      Thank you so much! I have another son with Celiac. Hope you are all well.

  121. annonymousbutknown November 26, 2014 at 10:58 am #

    Hey this is nice.. need any Tips mainly on how does a person realy be happy do get a freeTips

  122. annonymousbutknown November 26, 2014 at 10:59 am #

    congrats

  123. nrrust November 26, 2014 at 12:29 pm #

    My daughter was diagnosed with a rare, incurable, and progressive heart disease. Sadly her Drs. have no idea what to do. But, she us happy, positive, and us planning a future. Xoxo to your son

    • Lisa Goodwin November 26, 2014 at 12:43 pm #

      Oh my! I am so sorry to hear that. Put out whatever feelers on the internet in any way you can until you reach someone who has info for you. Glad to hear she is doing well.

  124. erinebarnett November 26, 2014 at 3:18 pm #

    Reblogged this on the day in the life of me.

  125. jouwiee November 26, 2014 at 10:23 pm #

    Your son is lucky to have you as his mother. Lovely post

  126. jacquelinelockhart November 27, 2014 at 1:10 am #

    Stay strong, I have friends with this disease and through diet and healthy conscious living they have a great life! You are an inspiration!

    • Lisa Goodwin November 27, 2014 at 2:20 am #

      Thank you so much for the good stories! I love to hear them!

  127. kiralynestes November 27, 2014 at 2:20 am #

    Prayers for you and your family. Your son sounds like a tough little boy. I wish you both the best.

  128. MixIC November 27, 2014 at 4:11 am #

    Reblogged this on Mixic.

  129. Raveesh Agarwal November 28, 2014 at 2:42 am #

    Attitude is everything. I wish you both best of luck with time, but I am actually capable of doing something more than just wishing.
    I’m from India and my mom happens to be a doctor of Naturotherapeutics and yoga. Your son is young now. A whole lifetime left. And when I see a disease, i have to cure it. When I was 5, she had tumors forming in all of her body, ready to die she was. But she got cured. Thanks to this discipline of treatment.
    Traditional doctors told the previous reports to be false. But false they weren’t.

    I’m not talking about administering any medicine or anything. Just some simple changes in diet and living, and I know that it’s completely possible that this might bring something good to the lives of you two.

    Obviously, you might think of this comment to be a marketing hoax, but I’m not selling anything. It’s something that saved my mom and I’m just spreading the goodness.

    I’ll like you to email the details to her ID,

    drpunam@naturotherapeutics.com

    I’ll tell her to research on it, then we’ll suggest something, a weeks treatment at home maybe, I’m sure it’ll bring some good to you. You could choose to accept it or not though, but if you do accept and get the good, then all you need to return is by spreading the goodness again.

    Best wishes.
    Stay healthy, stay happy. 🙂

    • Lisa Goodwin November 28, 2014 at 10:26 pm #

      Thank you so much!

      • Raveesh Agarwal November 28, 2014 at 10:29 pm #

        Thank me when my friend is cured

  130. darknight2light November 28, 2014 at 3:03 am #

    I am praying for the health and healing of your son. I too know how difficult life changing potentially fatal diagnosis can have on one’s own life, joy and perception. I always know that even in sickness there is a blessing. I practically could have my own pharmacy because of all of “my meds” but the blessing is I can help educate others who are afflicted with the same condition. I can help loved ones understand what this diagnosis means. I can explain that this med may have this side effect but if you do this you may avoid this. So there is always a hidden blessing we just have to be willing to look for it and patient enough to find it.

    • Lisa Goodwin November 28, 2014 at 10:26 pm #

      Thank you. I hope you are well!

      • darknight2light November 28, 2014 at 10:28 pm #

        Lisa Goodwin, thank you. I am ok. Struggling in my body, but I will be ok. If you have time maybe you can check out my blog. How is your son?

  131. hemphaus November 30, 2014 at 2:55 pm #

    Nice post!

    HempHausMag.com

  132. shocky30 November 30, 2014 at 3:23 pm #

    Reblogged this on shockysblog.

  133. Just There December 2, 2014 at 5:22 am #

    one word Beautiful.

  134. So Many Right Ways December 2, 2014 at 10:41 am #

    What a start to the year. I hope it got easier as it went along. Kid’s are amazingly resilient but we as parent live with our hearts on our sleeves. Good luck for 2015.

  135. todgermanica December 3, 2014 at 3:20 am #

    Very good results have been obtained with the paleo diet for Crohn’s disease. Check this link: http://thepaleodiet.blogspot.com/2010/03/paleo-diet-and-crohns-disease.html.

  136. MyHealthShare December 3, 2014 at 12:05 pm #

    Reblogged this on MyHealthshare Blogs.

  137. aartigirdhar December 4, 2014 at 2:42 am #

    very nicely put thoughts Lisa. lots of love and my very best wishes for your lovely son. I wish for you all the strength you need to face this challenge.

  138. physician21 December 4, 2014 at 5:54 pm #

    I hope that such nice boy will “liberate” us from our moulded view of health and perfection – something out of the box.

    • Lisa Goodwin December 4, 2014 at 8:15 pm #

      Thank you so much! What a lovely way to view this.

  139. physician21 December 4, 2014 at 5:55 pm #

    Reblogged this on physician21.

  140. The Private Practice Consultant December 5, 2014 at 10:42 pm #

    Reblogged this on The Private Practice Consultant and commented:
    Sometimes a diagnosis is more difficult for us as parents than it is for our children…But I truly believe that there is magic in optimism! This is a great narrative of the thoughts that plague a mother when dealing with a very hard truth, and the strength it takes.

    • Lisa Goodwin December 7, 2014 at 12:43 am #

      Thank you so much for your wise words!

  141. The Private Practice Consultant December 5, 2014 at 10:48 pm #

    I was sincerely touched by your narrative, I know you will support your son in his times of need and challenge. But remember, he’s supporting you in his times of happiness and courage.
    I’m currently reading a book entitled “Mind over Medicine”, Some very compelling information there. Keep up the great work!

  142. bdodd23 December 6, 2014 at 5:28 am #

    Hey there. I can’t imagine how you feel. I’m not a mother. I haven’t even been on a date. I’m a 21-year-old college student. However, 2014 has not been so kind to me either. The most relevant to what I want to share is this year I got really sick and at one point thought I had advanced cancer. However, I discovered that I have an auto immune disorder. Much like the first person to comment, I too was just glad it wasn’t cancer. However, it also was not the best news. I too have a big pill organizer filled with “my meds”. I know the ins and outs of so many parts of the human body. With my disorder I have a lot of inflammation with my digestion systems. This last year I have been poked and prodded. It was really hard but I learned a lot from it. One of those is a great sense of humor. However, I could not imagine going through all of this when I was younger. Your son seems like a very strong man. You seem like an amazing mother. Your family is in my prayers. Wish you the best of luck.

  143. emmyrose101 December 8, 2014 at 1:42 pm #

    Reblogged this on emmyrose101.

  144. ackfastblog December 8, 2014 at 8:51 pm #

    Your post is so compelling. Life is not without pain some are more than others but, in many ways there is happiness. Continue being strong and proactive. All the best to you and your shining star!

    • Lisa Goodwin December 9, 2014 at 2:28 pm #

      Thank you so much! I love what you said!

  145. pimplehead December 9, 2014 at 12:21 pm #

    Pretty Amazing, good Job!

    Follow me @ http://pimplehead.wordpress.com

  146. laru004 December 10, 2014 at 2:39 am #

    Reblogged this on laru004's Blog.

  147. Cloud December 15, 2014 at 7:19 pm #

    I your beautiful post brought tears to my eyes. I agree, being a parent is hard, specially when we cannot keep bad things away from our babies. We wish we could keep them away from any kind of pain and it we get desperate if we can’t. But with that cheeky little smile and your love he will be just fine and able to deal with whatever. All the best to your beautiful boy and you

    • Lisa Goodwin December 16, 2014 at 10:13 pm #

      Thank you so much! That is so sweet of you and so very true.

  148. christasp2014 December 19, 2014 at 7:08 am #

    Reblogged this on How to Not Kill Yourself and commented:
    This is a prime example of how us doctor’s and nurses forget that something is not “just routine” in the eyes of the parents or family members. Eye opening read.

  149. shoelessjess December 23, 2014 at 4:14 am #

    That was so well written. Ive just now found you, and am following you for your honest take on life!
    If your son ever wants a man-to-man chat about Crohn’s, let me know. I had the pleasure of working alongside one of the grestest male camp counselors I’ve ever known who has Crohn’s. He was a rock in the special-diet community at camp, and has spent many hours taking samples and sitting in machines.
    You have a beautiful boy there, and he’s unstoppable!

    • Lisa Goodwin December 23, 2014 at 12:38 pm #

      Thank you so much for your kind words and offer! Both are much appreciated. I hope your friend is doing well. Thank you for reading!

  150. Adrianna December 24, 2014 at 6:42 am #

    On the flip side i am humbled and educated by people like your son and i value this immensly.

  151. bEgiNNinG December 26, 2014 at 12:26 pm #

    May Allahs Peace be upon you and your son..
    Just read your post. You wrote your heart awesomely!!
    And yes a mother can never bear pain of a slight cut, she is the most precious gift to all of us.. I pray that your son recovers very fast, till then you should have patience…

    Thats All, God bless you 🙂

    • Lisa Goodwin December 26, 2014 at 6:49 pm #

      Thank you so much! I really appreciate that.

  152. ashleef08 December 28, 2014 at 11:08 pm #

    As a mother with a sick child as well, I fully understand your pain and will pray for answers and healing.

    • Lisa Goodwin December 29, 2014 at 12:06 am #

      Thank you so much! Will do the same for you!

  153. seacrestmassage January 1, 2015 at 8:14 am #

    Reblogged this on The Truth Was Known, The Truth Is Known.

  154. Amy Holsworth Castillo January 5, 2015 at 3:22 am #

    I was diagnosed with colitis at 17, i cant imagine Crohn’s at 10. Thank for sharing this beautiful post.

    I will pray for you and your brave son

    • Lisa Goodwin January 5, 2015 at 4:45 am #

      Thank you so much, Amy. I hope you are doing great!

      • Amy Holsworth Castillo January 5, 2015 at 4:47 am #

        I am, thank you. My thoughts are with y’all

  155. Nikki January 19, 2015 at 10:23 pm #

    Good luck to your child and to your family. Namaste.

  156. gypsyjade09 January 21, 2015 at 2:21 am #

    Reblogged this on gypsyjade09.

  157. akadarkhorse January 27, 2015 at 5:52 pm #

    Your son is a great kid! All the best for his beautiful future 🙂
    these are like zebra crossings where we need to be a little brave and you guys just crossed that so now you’re out of fear .. 🙂

    • Lisa Goodwin January 27, 2015 at 7:12 pm #

      Thank you very much! I am so touched by this. Beautiful advice.

  158. cashorali April 26, 2015 at 5:07 pm #

    “Maybe he’s doing all right already.” This is one of the most uplifting things I’ve come across. I appreciate the way it speaks to being in the present, and adapting to what we find here. Thank you for th

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