My Son and My Swollen Heart

11 Dec


This year has not been easy.

At the end of last year’s school year, my son was trying to select courses for his first year at middle school. He wanted to take chorus but was reluctant.

“Do you like to sing?”


“You should take chorus.”

“I like singing but I’m not sure about chorus.”

“Are you worried you will be teased about it because you’re a boy?”


“You should take chorus.”

He was already dealing with more than any 11 year old child should have to deal with: a Crohn’s Disease diagnosis and the attempt to get it under control. He was also being followed for rapidly progressing Scoliosis and only 4 degrees away from getting a brace he would have to wear 23 hours a day for at least 3 years. He selected chorus.

Recently, I was involved in a fundraiser for Crohn’s, Colitis, and Celiac (which another son of mine happens to have). It was successful in that we raised money, awareness, and spirits, particularly those of my sons. The following day, my son had his follow up appointment with the orthopedist to determine if his Scoliosis would finally require a restrictive brace. Eight months elapsed since his last X-ray and I spent most of the day alternating between holding my breath and praying for good news. Miraculously, his Scoliosis did not worsen; if anything, it may have slightly improved.

Perhaps good deeds beget goodness. Perhaps that fundraiser made a large karmic dent in our tiny world. Perhaps my son was just entitled to finally receive some good news. Perhaps.

Last night was his first chorus concert. He stood, clad in a bow tie, next to the only other boy in chorus, amid a sea of 35 girls. He was also chosen with three other children to sing parts of “Do You Want to Build a Snowman.” As I crouched in the aisle of the auditorium, taking pictures and watching this boy, with his unique and immutable spirit, I cried. He has survived so much in so little time and he is doing what he wants and living his life. Good for you, Eli, good for you. Don’t let anything keep you down, my baby boy. You are unstoppable.

I am so thankful for this current lull in the great and unwanted upheaval of life. It may be temporary but that is no different than the life belonging to anyone else. There are good days and bad days and days in between. The hope is that the good days outweigh the bad and that we are lucky enough to find them and know them and love them.



7 Responses to “My Son and My Swollen Heart”

  1. akwabena91 December 12, 2014 at 7:05 am #

    Is funny sometimes why people laugh at talent

  2. arnuwan December 17, 2014 at 4:23 pm #


  3. mergo79 December 27, 2014 at 8:14 pm #

    while browsing through the wordpress blogs I came across this story. Tell your son I have a lot of respect for him and that he should make a habit of following his throughout all of his life.

    Greetings from Belgium.


  4. faridaalihussain96 February 13, 2015 at 10:27 am #

    Your Son is a real Hero… I was almost in tears when I read through your post. Hats off to him. All my love to your son. He is a great champ.. I’m glad he did what he wanted to do.. unlike other kids. He looks very cute in the picture too… God bless him !

    • Lisa Goodwin February 13, 2015 at 1:15 pm #

      Thank you so much! I am moved that you were so moved. I will pass your lovely words on to my son.

  5. imaz78 March 2, 2015 at 7:42 am #

    Reblogged this on imaz78.

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